Thank you for your prayers. I have been before the throne myself. If you need to build your faith, I suggest adopting! My goodness!
I was a mess last night. But, God's mercies are new every morning. I spent serious time in prayer both last night and this morning.
Several things I know:
1)I want God's timing. If he is saying that waiting until Spring to get Alice Faith is best, that's what I want. I want what he wants. He will give me the desires of my heart, sometimes he changes those desires first. He only does what's best.
2)I had to get my eyes off Alice Faith and onto Christ. When I look at her, my heart breaks and I feel crushed by the weight of my baby being so far away. But, when I look at Christ, all of that seems easy, manageable, and even holy. He is everything. He is my light, my strength, my song. In Christ alone, my hope is found.
3)I feel a bit like David after the birth of his first son with Bathsheba. I am going to beg, plead and approach the Lord to super-naturally bring all of this together this week. But, if on Tuesday he didn't work it out that way, I am going to get up, dust off and go about life with joyful worship.
4)This is not like a miscarriage, a death, or a failed adoption. This is but a pause. This is easy compared with the other. I praise the Lord for this trial. (James 1:2) I am grateful that he is shaping me. Who am I that he would spend such time and care?
Thank you for coming along side us in this and praying for us. This morning I am joyful, grateful and hopeful. I am very full. I have the Ancient of Days on my side. What else could I want?
This song has been swirling through my head all morning. Here are the words and I'm adding a video of the song as well. I hope you are as blessed by it as I have been.
In Christ alone, my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My comforter, my all-in-all
Here in the love of Christ I stand
There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious day
Up from the grave He rose again!
And as He stands in victory
Sin’s curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ
No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life’s first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
Till He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I’ll stand